While my youngest grandson took a nap, I had my iPod plugged into my ear, listening to one of the Beth Moore Bible studies on the life and person of Jesus Christ. Something she said really caught my attention in a special way. She was talking about Jesus' directions, ""But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you," Matthew 5:44. She then referred to Romans 12:9, "Let love be without hypocrisy." In other words, we are supposed to mean it,  not just "act” it.

As Sandwich Generation caregivers, we are sometimes caught in situations where we have to care for someone we don’t like very much. I’m so blessed to have good relationships with all my parents which has made my caregiving much easier. But I have talked to people or read articles by  those who are caring for parents or other elderly relatives they just don’t get along with. And even though I don’t have to deal with that specifically in my caregiving, I’ve certainly worked with people in the past who were challenges. As one of my pastors commented in a sermon, they are EGRP – extra grace required people.

God convicted me long ago to pray for the EGRP in my life. He has even led me to specifically pray for Him to bless them. It's definitely NOT always easy or even my first choice. But He has kept working on me, over the years, to choose to do this, even when I didn't feel like it.

I was excited and challenged by what Ms. Moore said in this Bible study (which I HIGHLY recommend, by the way). She offered a very practical suggestion how to do it and I love it!  She said, “I ask God to give me several verses so that I can begin to pray over them, praying for them, praying for how I feel about that situation, about that particular person and He will begin to give me the mind of Christ for that person and change the way I feel.”  Isn’t that a terrific idea?

Praying for and choosing a verse or two specifically for that person will keep us from the “I’m not sure what to pray so I’ll just pray, 'Please bless them and hold them close Lord,' over and over.” Don’t get me wrong. That’s an excellent prayer for them as well. BUT by having a couple (or more) of specific inspirational Bible verses to Scripture pray for them, we will be praying according to God’s will, we will be coating them in specific prayer, and we will be allowing God to work on our hearts and minds all at the same time. Sometimes we may be blessed to see these EGRP’s change as a result of our prayers. Many times we won’t. But I know, in my life, I’ve seen myself change for the better. Come to think of it, this would be a great gift for any of those we provide senior home care giving, not just EGRPs! What a gift to them and what a gift to ourselves.

Do you get frustrated during cold and flu season because you and your grandkids have to miss church so much? Or are you the grandparent who watches them for an hour or two when they're sick so their mom and dad can go to church, then high tail it to second service yourself (that's us ).  That's fine for you and the parents, but what about the kiddies? How about doing a homeschool-Sunday School for them when you're babysitting for the parents?

If they're extremely sick, they may only be up to a Bible story or, perhaps, a Christian DVD. But if they're feeling OK other than being contagious, you can have a really great time together. My grandkids and I just did that this morning. I took over a couple of favorite childrens books of Bible stories that we all love, including the Pray & Play Bible. We read about Jonah and talked about the different lessons we can learn from his life, like:

• God is present everywhere so there's nowhere we can hide from Him. Psalm 139, including 8-12 – "If I go up to the heavens, You are there;  if I make my bed in the depths, You are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn,  if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there Your hand will guide me, Your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me," even the darkness will not be dark to You; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to You."(NIV)
• God wants everyone to be saved and that should be one of our desires as well. – "The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance." 2 Peter 3:9
• Jonah had to choose to obey or disobey God. We have the same choices daily, and we should always choose to obey God. Every time we disobey God we are following Jonah's bad example.
• Every time we cheerfully obey we are following Jonah's good example. In fact, every day when we wake up, we can tell God "Thank You for this day. Please use me today and help me to make the right choices."

After we finished the story, we sang a couple of songs from the book then had a great time making BIG FISH puppets from envelopes, following the book's suggestion to cut one strip off the skinny left side of the envelope and a triangle out of the middle of the skinny right side. They put their hands in the big opening and "swam" the fish around. They had so much fun decorating these and I had so much fun watching them.

They all did a great job and we had such a delightful time. As they worked on the fish, I praised God for yet another fun opportunity to do a bit of "soul-fishing and soul-training" of my own with my sweet grandchildren.

Happy Second Sunday of Advent! My senior mom and I returned late this week from visiting family. It was so wonderful to see family members we rarely see and we were thrilled with all the wonderful hugs and love. Then we got to come home to even more wonderful hugs and love from family we are blessed to be close to. Talk about a wonderful HIGH for the week.

It wasn’t all happy and roses though as we had to deal with some health issues for a close senior relative, including a CAT scan to see what, if anything, was causing some stomach discomfort. After a lot of prayer and concern, the doctor said nothing major was showing up and that hopefully the discomfort would pass, otherwise more tests would follow in the coming weeks.

So far, praise God, the pain seems to have vanished and our dear kin is doing much better. I was so encouraged by all the prayers from our family, including one grandchild who even asked her class to pray. It is such a blessing to see the fruit of our teaching blooming so wonderfully in the next generation! And it is so encouraging to see God’s hand at work, even in dark situations. This time, it looks like He is giving us a reprieve. I know another time He may allow us to go through “high waters.” I also know that, even then, we can rest solidly on His promises including one of my absolute favorites from Isaiah 41:10:

Do not fear, for I am with you;

Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God.

I will strengthen you,

Surely I will help you,

SURELY I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.

I LOVE that second SURELY, don’t you! What a wonderful verse to give us hope during difficult situations! And what a blessing to be surrounded by family and friends who God often uses to encourage us.

One of my online friends who is great at that is Denise Brown from Caregiving.com. Today, she is kicking off a “Caregiving Holiday Progressive Blog Party” for care givers. To any and all who are visiting from that party, WELCOME! The goal of SandwichINK is to provide information and words of encouragement to all care givers, with a focus on the Sandwich Generation. The Sandwich Generation is made up of those who are providing senior home care to aging parents while still caring for kids at home and/or even helping extensively with grandchildren. Many of us are also in the Baby Boomer Generation.

I’ve been a member of the Sandwich Generation for over ten years, helping with senior parents, including my father who is now in heaven after battling with Parkinson’s Disease for over 15 years. I also help care for four of my many wonderful grandchildren, and deal with a wide variety of issues in that arena including special needs. Life is always challenging, never boring, and definitely rewarding and I am so grateful to God for that! I enjoy helping others, both through hands-on care and through my writing. SandwichINK, along with SandwichINK Real Estate Info (where I combine my love of real estate with the needs of the Sandwich Generation), both give me a chance to do just that!

I’d love for you to sign up SandwichINK’s free email. You’ll get regular updates on all that’s going on here, including fun projects for grandparents, great resources for senior home caregivers, tech tips to keep your computer working well, happy holiday ideas like Advent wreaths and fun Christmas tree ornaments, and so much more!

Thank you for stopping by and have a blessed Christmas season! Don’t forget to click on Caregiving.com’s Party Widget to find more interesting Progressive Party sites!  And check back tomorrow for A Pause for Advent!

Lord, You have been our dwelling place in all generations.

Before the mountains were born

Or You gave birth to the earth and the world,

Even from everlasting to everlasting,

You are God.

Psalm 90:1-2

I love these Words of Encouragement from God. Whether senior home care is keeping us busy, or grandchildren, or both – as is often the case for the Sandwich Generation, we can have peace of mind that comes from knowing that God is there from everlasting to everlasting!

For more pictures and words to encourage your heart, pop over to Penny Raine’s blog.

Running inside with his special Star War LEGOs creation, my grandson tripped and fell on the patio steps. He was fine, but his LEGOs crashed and the various pieces flew off in different directions, leaving him very upset.

I came out, gave him a big hug and helped him pick up all the pieces. As we did so, I discovered a sharp piece of broken glass lying under the pile of leaves. “Hey there, Sweetie,” I told him.  “Do you remember that verse I taught you? Romans 8:28: ‘And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.’” “Yup,” he replied. “This is such a perfect example of that verse,” I told him. “You thought it was all bad that you dropped your LEGOs. But God worked it out for our good by using that to help me find this broken glass that could easily have hurt you or your puppy dogs!” He cheerfully agreed, then ran off with a big smile on his face and his hands full of his new and old LEGOs. I followed, enjoying the thrill of watching God at work in his life and mine!

Kaye

I was visiting at one of my favorite blogs, Penny Raine,  and discovered a delightful meme she is participating in, Word-Filled Wednesday. The purpose of Word-Filled Wednesday is to share God’s Words (no famous quotes or other literature — only the precious and beautiful words of our Lord God) through photos & a Bible verse! I noticed we can also add a little thought of our own, as well. What a great idea! And what a great encouragement it was to me as I read the various sites.

I decided to share this with you, as well, on a weekly basis. As Sandwich Generation senior home care givers and grandparents, we can always use extra encouragement. So I am actually posting early for my next post and in the future, I hope to be participating in this great meme each Wednesday. I’d love to hear your comments about it. And do be sure to check out the other encouraging and uplifting photos and verses which you can find at Penny’s site. It’s a great opportunity to stop for just a second to spend time in praise and worship to our wonderful Lord, then head back to caregiving duties with a lighter heart!

The earth is full of Your lovingkindness, O Lord, teach me Your statutes. Psalm 119:64

When I am tired or discouraged, I love to walk out to look at the gorgeous flowers, delightful trees, fluffy clouds…

All of God’s creation is a gift to us, reminding us of His love, His power, and His majesty!

As I look at all the beauty He created, I am blessed and encouraged!

Thank You, Lord God!

There are three verses that I have been thinking about a lot this week, as my grand-twins, grand-big-brother and I keep plugging away at our Fruit of the Spirit summer project. (Well, technically it’s eight verses – or two verses and a passage ) They are all wrapped into one of the songs we’ve been learning for our project. I Walk By Faith by Chris Folson is a fun praise and worship song for grandma and grandkids alike and it includes quotes from each of the three verses.  We’ve had a great time learning the song and singing it together as we continue to “hide God’s Word in our hearts.” In focusing on this song over the last few days, I realized how encouraging they are for all of us in the Sandwich Generation.

We don’t always understand why things happen the way they do. Why Grandma got Alzheimer’s Disease, why granddaughter has Spina Bifida, why Uncle George is struggling after his third stroke. Why all these things happened so close together. They do, though, to so many. Particularly in our Baby Boomer Generation. The question isn’t “why.” The question is, “what.” What can we do about it?  We can prayerfully seek to keep our eyes fixed on God, putting one foot in front of the other, and taking care of whatever needs doing each day.

We walk by faith, not by sight. 2 Corinthians 5:7

What happens if one or more of our beloveds develops dementia of some kind, arguing with us unreasonably, yelling untruths about us from a mind clouded in a fog.  God holds us close and tells us,

“No weapon that is formed against you will prosper; And every tongue that accuses you in judgment you will condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, And their vindication is from Me,” declares the LORD. Isaiah 54:17

There are days when we feel so alone, so lonely, and as if the world is coming against us. That’s when we can grab hold of the book of Romans, particularly the 8th chapter, and hunker down and dwell in it. I often like to write out verses and carry them with me to “snack” on them. Romans 8:31-35 is wonderful for that:

If God is for us, who is against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things? Who will bring a charge against God’s elect? God is the one who justifies; who is the one who condemns? Christ Jesus is He who died, yes, rather who was raised, who is at the right hand of God, who also intercedes for us. Romans 8:31-35

If you’re in the midst of a difficult circumstance, feel free to join me in printing these out and carrying them with you. If you’re in a quieter, more peaceful moment, cherish it! And prepare for any future rapids that may carry you into rushing water by hiding these blessed Words of God in your heart. In that case, my grandsons and I invite you to join us in that project as well with this fun video.

Grab a grandkid or five and learn it with them. Have fun singing it at the top of your lungs, making up fun hand and feet motions, knowing you are tucking vital truths into your heart and the hearts of your grandkids. What better way to spend time! 

Engrossed in watching the error messages my computer was spewing at me, I was somewhat amused that I apparently spilled my spoonful of yogurt onto my lap . When I looked down, shock replaced my amusement! The whole jar of yogurt was all over my pants. As I looked closer, I realized the bottom of the yogurt container had given way!

M y first reaction was “What did I do wrong?” Then I realized it was just an out-of-the-ordinary event. As the expression goes, “Stuff happens!”

God allows stuff in my life periodically to train me. These events let me practice praising Him for all things, even sticky fluffy messes in my lap. They cause me to stop and focus on God. To “be still” before God in prayer for just a minute, even if I’m rushing.

If I learn to stop and take a deep breath before reacting to a small thing, I then find it easier to do the same when something big hits home. As Paul says in 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, and in everything give thanks, for this is the will of God, in Christ Jesus, for you.” All of these small lessons train me to better handle the big things that occur to me often which is part of being a caregiver for elderly parents and grandkids.

Such a lot of good lessons in such a small package of yogurt. God excels at that and I’m so glad!

I was reading through my Twitter Micro-Blog and noticed a friend commenting on how many people use the word pray without really doing it . I think that holds true in the real world as well as the virtual world, don’t you? So often people will say, “I’ll pray for you,” then they never do. I know I used to be guilty of that on a regular basis. Not on purpose. I would just plum forget.

Then I heard a pastor speak on this very topic. He suggested that when someone asks you to pray, or when you are talking to someone and you tell them you will pray – DO IT RIGHT THEN . Wow! Such a simple concept and yet it had never occurred to me up to that point. In sharing this concept with others, I’ve discovered I’m not alone there.

I immediately decided that I would do that, to the best of my ability. Even when I was in my 30’s I didn’t claim to have the best memory in the world. As a member of the Baby Boomer generation, I am now in my 50s and my memory is not any better. In fact, with all the input I get from grandkids, aging parents, cell phones, text messages, internet info, and iPod, it’s probably a whole lot worse. But that’s OK.

Now when I am talking to someone and they tell me about an issue, I tell them I will pray and I do it right then ! Sometimes I do it in my head. Shhh, don’t tell, but sometimes I even send up a quick prayer while they are still talking. Sometimes, I ask if it’s ok if I pray for them right then and there. I’ve gotten a few shocked looks, but rarely get turned down. And I get a lot of thank yous!

As God brings them to my mind, I try to pray again several times . But by praying for them right away, I know I’ve prayed and I know God is awesome and is working in their lives as well as mine . So I rest content on His promises NOT my faulty memory. As a caregiver , that’s a wonderful thing. As you well know, we are subject to plenty of interruptions so we need that.

So there you have it. One important secret to praying for others is to just do it. Right then, right when you think of it, and again as God brings it to mind. It’s a joy to watch God work in and through us and our prayers, I can promise you that.

I had to drop off my van at the service center. Again! Since moving cross country as part of my caregiving journey,  it had been in the shop for problems four times in one year! I must confess, I was feeling very down in the mouth about it all.

To add insult to injury, five minutes after I left I realized I had left my parking pass in the glove compartment and had to go back to get it. My bleak mood turned even darker.

I stood waiting at the service manager’s desk as he went to look for it in the car. As I did so, God nudged me to start praising Him for all of this. As I thanked Him for this situation, He gently pointed out that I had remembered it while still close by and not when I was late and needed to hurry. As I continued to praise Him, I could feel myself relaxing. Even my countenance seemed to be lightening up.

The situation hadn’t changed, but my perspective had and it was, indeed, a wonderful thing!

“Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord,

always giving thanks to God the Father for everything,

in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.”

Ephesians 5:19b-20 (NIV)

Now it’s time for a confession. I typed this article, uploaded it to my site, only to discover it wouldn’t format correctly. After fighting with it for 30 minutes, and with no clue why it was acting this way, I gave up and deleted it. Starting over, I pasted the original into a brand new page, uploaded it again, same problem! I’m sure you’re probably thinking, based on what I wrote above, that I was just chirping away happily, praising God.

Sadly, the answer is, nope. I was getting rather frustrated and not too happy. But then (I love those words. God uses them so much in my life ), God AGAIN whispered in my ear. He basically told me to go READ what I’d been writing. You should see the big smile on my face as I type this! AGAIN, He changed my perspective.

Let’s face it, as Sandwich Generation caregivers, life is going to have plenty of problems, bumps, irritations, and frustrating moments. But the Lord has promised to be there with us through all of them. And He’s promised to love us no matter how often we blow it. And He’s promised to bless us when we choose to praise Him and thank Him no matter what the circumstances.

So yes, I blew it, AGAIN. But then I confessed AGAIN. And wonderfully and miraculously, He forgave me AGAIN. And hopefully, I will hang on to His peace long enough to get this posted, and beyond. And if I forget AGAIN, I know He will remind me AGAIN, and we will continue this caregiving journey together always and forever. Now that’s a wonderful perspective!

P.S. After writing that, AND praying, I uploaded it and it all worked wonderfully. Praise God!!!